Here.

There's a constant internal conflict between thoughts, endless supressions and wishing stars that have ceased to shine. My mind is a battlefield with a limited amount of truces that I've experienced throughout the years. I cannot help but think that it will always be this way, sometimes harder, sometimes unnoticed, sometimes even crippling.

The latest frequent thought crossing my mind is "I need to get out of here". Such a common phrase, one I've used often and in more than one language. It usually means I'm in a place where I feel uncomfortable or I feel the need to leave for whatever reason. Lately...the phrase expresses new meanings, all at once bursting out of every pore on my body.

"Here" means the places I go to that no longer bring me comfort.

"Here" means my town, city, home, island, country.

Hell..."Here" can even be the 4 walls which currently constrict me, decorated with pictures of Hindu gods, paintings, windows. My personal space.

But I believe that "here" these days has meant something I can't seem to run away from. It's a situation that has taken grasp of me and refused to let go. Because the innocent ones are always the ones who pay, and because we're easier to be played with.

"Here" means the state of mind in which I currently find myself; that long lost depressive feeling that somehow came back and has creeped into me like a prodigal son. Let me clarify that "you" were not missed.

I hate being here and I need to get out.

Common words with a stronger meaning.

Someday I'll find an exit.